A few years back, word got out about a psychologist in Hawaii who created some big-time miracles with a ward of criminally insane patients. All without ever seeing any of them personally.
Before he came along, patients attacked staff in the hallways. Said staff was terrified to come to work.
Within a few months, patients were getting well. Staff satisfaction soared.
Eventually, the ward was closed entirely because virtually all the patients had been released.
So how did this psychologist do it?
By working on himself.
Every day he went to work and rather than seeing patients, he sat in his office and directed his attention toward healing whatever unhealed place in himself had created their illness.
He utilized an ancient Hawaiian healing prayer you may have heard of. It’s called ho’oponopono, and it goes like this:
I love you.
I’m sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
Remarkable, yes?
The story of Dr. Hew Len brought ho’oponopono into mainstream awareness, and it’s now shared in a ton of personal development and healing programs.
And I will tell you from first-hand experience, it’s powerful.
So why am I sharing this story?
It’s been a tumultuous couple of weeks to say the least, with our country’s polarization blown up in all its glory on everyone’s Facebook and Twitter feeds.
Many of us are feeling like perhaps the world has gone completely insane.
Many, many of us are feeling woken up from our slumber, and are called to step up and show up in a way we never have before.
On both sides there’s been a lot of less-than-enlightened behavior… even in the transformation space.
It’s not surprising, because we’ve got nothing if not massive FEAR about how this is going to play out. When we’re fearful, it’s all too easy to slip into an overwhelming desire to be right – fear masquerading as righteous and judgment.
But let’s be clear about what this really is… it’s an aspect of the shadow that lives in all of us.
Fact its, we all have a dark side.
We all have the capacity to exclude, judge, cheat, lie, destroy. Even kill.
And shadow requires judgment, because if things were not judged they would not be in the shadow.
What you resist, persists – and even become stronger. Resist your dark side, it holds on tight.
The shadow is a force, it’s energy. It has a motion, a movement. Above all, it wants to be expressed.
And it WILL be expressed, one way or another. The question, of course, is how it will show up.
For many, a vote for Trump was a call against the shadow of the Washington status quo.
Many others feel that we just put a glaring symbol of our collective shadow in the White House.
Regardless of how you voted or who you support, one thing is clear – we are all being asked to come to terms with the shadow, within and without.
So what can we do to make peace with this shadow, to heal from our individual and collective pain, and to begin to truly effect change?
In the story of Dr. Len, people asked why the ho’oponopono prayer worked.
The reason is simple, but not easy. The reason the prayer works is personal responsibility.
The whole premise behind ho’oponopono (and what makes it so powerful) is that we are all creating our own experience, both internal and external. Therefore, we all have the power to heal and transform that experience.
In an excerpt from Zero Limits, a book written about Dr. Len by Joe Vitale, he explains what personal responsibility means:
This means that terrorist activity, the president, the economy–anything you experience and don’t like–is up for you to heal. They don’t exist, in a manner of speaking, except as projections from inside you. The problem isn’t with them, it’s with you, and to change them, you have to change you.
Holy shizz, right?
It can be a tough pill to swallow, especially when we really, really don’t like what we’re seeing.
Especially when we’re not comfortable with our own shadow.
But personal responsibility is not about blame. It’s about personal power.
There is no downside to taking 100% responsibility for your experience.
Sometimes it’s about asking…
What’s my role in this?
How have I contributed to this?
How have we all contributed to this collective experience of division, separation, attack and fear?
No judgment here. Just truthful inquiry, compassion, and most of all, love.
What unhealed place in myself can I direct my energy toward to transform this?
Anger, outrage, fear, despair…these are all real emotions, real energies, but we get to choose where we direct that energy.
Can we be compassionate at this time? Especially with ourselves, first and foremost?
Regardless of who you voted for or where you stand… as a collective, we remain in pain.
My invitation to you is to lean into the healing – starting with your own.
I love you.
I’m sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
If Dr. Len could single-handedly cure one ward of criminally insane patients, imagine what powerful healing we could collectively create in our world by joining together in this approach.
Let’s lean into the healing, and the next step will be revealed.
I love you.
I’m sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
Love and magic to you, now and always.
Wow, Elizabeth. Thank you. This is incredibly powerful, and so relevant for where I am in my life at the moment.
A question for you though – when you take personal responsibility for things through ho’oponopono, how do you manage not to be overwhelmed with trying to fix everything for everyone? Is it that you are spreading the intention outward, and focussing and working inward, which protects you from the overwhelm? This is something I struggle with, so would really appreciate your input.
Kristina, maybe the personal responsibility takes the form of simply following the ho’oponopono “prayer” and not trying to fix anything for anyone. It is happening on the level of energy……. a quality of alignment that comes with the prayer. It may be followed by action, or by letting go.
Say it, let it go. I find it helps me stay out of worry mode, it gives me a channel for my energy of concern. Sometimes I keep repeating it, thinking of various people or situations, I say it, and I let go of the results.
This is SO good Elizabeth, thank you so much for this!! I have been off social media for weeks because of all of the chaos, and this is something that really resonates- thank you for providing a perspective that empowers and, in doing so, uplifts- love it:)
PRAYER FOR AMERICA
“O Thou kind Lord! This gathering is turning…”
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O Thou kind Lord! This gathering is turning to Thee. These hearts are radiant with Thy love. These minds and spirits are exhilarated by the message of Thy glad-tidings. O God! Let this American democracy become glorious in spiritual degrees even as it has aspired to material degrees, and render this just government victorious. Confirm this revered nation to upraise the standard of the oneness of humanity, to promulgate the Most Great Peace, to become thereby most glorious and praiseworthy among all the nations of the world. O God! This American nation is worthy of Thy favors and is deserving of Thy mercy. Make it precious and near to Thee through Thy bounty and bestowal.
—‘Abdu’l-Bahá from the Baha’i’ Faith
Profoundly wonderful, Elizabeth. Thank you for this. A brave post – the type of authenticity that resonates with me. I appreciate the reminder of these 4 phrases – the book you mention is on my shelf. Personal responsibility changes everything for me, when I take responsibility, I can shift from thinking that is low vibration. Keep this stuff coming! I loved your videos a while ago that had just a little touch of magic in them. AWESOME. It uplifted me out of my doldrums – into that space of possibility and hope.
Yes. And yes again. Some years ago I was asked to speak about peace to a Unitarian Church as a representative of a Buddhist lay order. As I prepared my thoughts, I recognized that what I really needed to talk about was love and inclusiveness. That meant I also needed to talk about hatred and bigotry (the shadow side that obscures love and inclusiveness). One of my concluding thoughts was that in order to truly love enough to bring about peace we first needed to learn to love those practicing bigotry. I think this Hawaiian prayer and the personal responsibility it requires is another way of saying the same thing.
I love this, Elizabeth Purvis! Yes, this is how I live. This is a powerful go-to tool for me that I have used for years now. I love how you apply it to the election and what is going on in the collective right now. I completely agree. If people could only see, I kept thinking, what they are playing out in all this. Thank you.
Personal Responsibility, yes. The more personal responsibility you are willing to take, the more power you have. And that is great news for us Manifesting Queens.
I really love and agree with this post, Elizabeth. In that pause before the reaction, looking within and connecting with love and forgiveness of my self, can move others. Great thoughts with this post.